The Historical Pig And What It Has To Do With Robin WIlliams

I just saw Robin Williams on youtube. Youtube is like a bad curse! Have you ever realised how much valuable time you spend on that darn website? It's addictive, I think it has the potential to even overrule meth and crack. I mean, yesterday I spent hours watching the Victoria's Secret runway show (Hana, when will I ever be rich enough to afford them bras? Now is a good time to start considering marrying Donald Trump). And today I've been watching all stand up comedies from David Chapelle, Russel Peters and Robin Williams.

Robin Williams says nowadays everyone is into the whole 'iPod' scene. Well he's looking for an 'iWife'. It's got a 'touch' screen, where you can touch all you want, a hole, it doesn't pretend to know everything, and the best part is it knows that he has a 'hard' drive. Get it? Hilarious!!

Zaza wants me to tell the pork story. So here goes. We Muslims can't eat pork, and honestly even if we can, I'd think twice about those two wet snorty holes in the pig's face. But we found this Buddhist restaurant that serves everything soy. They have imitations of everything - fish, chicken, cat, and God bless them, pork! Now I know if my neighbour in Serdang sees me eating a pork-imitated soy dish, she would start shaking her head, turn to the nearest group of kids and say, "You see that girl? You don't want to be like her. She's on a fast track to prison."

Anyway, one fine night we decided to give it a try. One can't help but wonder how a pig tastes like. What was the fuss all about? So we ordered. One fat plate of honey soy pork. And here comes the lumps of red coloured soy meat. Meanwhile Zaza was still denying her right to taste the soy pork. Instead she was having this hideous plate of crispy noodles, which looks like a bird's nest to me. All it needs is a few feather strands here and there, and lo and behold! A fat Dodo bird might land on it.

I tried the soy pork. First mouthful. Exactly how I thought pig would taste like. Chewy. Strangely sweet. Now this is quite nice, I thought. Second mouthful. Is it just me or does this meat feels strangely chewy? Almost like eating fat. Third mouthful. Okay, puking alert, puking alert! Then I look up at Zaza and said, "you should try them! They're really good!"

Oh by the way, throughout this whole story, Hana was just busy picking on the chicken salad. Sadly enough she had spared me any blonde moments throughout this dinner. I swear to God, usually she even makes Paris Hilton look bad.

Now here comes Zaza with her first taste of bloody soy pork. She chews it, pauses for a moment, then said, "It's okay I guess." Do you know this look people always give you when they're lying? It's a very significant look. Their noses would be slightly flared, and they say their words out slowly. In this case Zaza was saying how it tastes okay, but that smile on her face literally screams Oh-God-get-me-a-paper-bag. And that was our pork moment.

The One Where I Found Out That We Grew Up

I honestly can't believe that I haven't been blogging for more than a year! This could possibly be due to me busy being educated on rocks and soils and the works. I still remember sitting in class watching my old-as-fossil lecturer talking about some trilobites (which are basically ancient cockroaches that died. Honestly, I'm beginning to feel that the cockroaches themselves weren't aware that they were important). Now I am on the fast track to graduate! Yeehaa!

I just got back from a three-week long winter holiday getaway. I went to East Australia, spent all my money, and now I'm ending up eating Maggi for the rest of the bloody month.

The trip was great. Wait. That's an understatement. The trip was super! I haven't seen my girlfriends for ages, and it was good to be back with the old crowd. Hana has a boyfriend now, which made me feel like I was the one stuck in time and she took the express train to Capri. But he was a really nice guy, and I could never be more happy for her. I just hope to God that she doesn't have any 'future' plans yet (we have travelling plans, remember?). Odd has turned into this incredible, gorgeous woman, and it's amazing how just a few years back, we were busy sneaking out of dinner halls and hiding under the beds from wardens. Oh, and need I to remind you about all those late night binging? Sigh, the times where you can eat a tonne of junk food and never gain a pound. Zaza is literally the new hot stuff, the amazing transition from Mr. Macho Man I'm-with-the-guitar-and-a-checkered-shirt to about twenty handbags. Changes, changes.

Sydney was bea-utiful! I especially loved the long ferry rides where you sit outside and watch the city lights at night. It makes you feel like there's a whole world out there. You can either choose to sit back and watch the world rotate or jump in and join the whole chaos. The sea breeze is so nice in your face and the whole city passes you buy. There was a couple who was standing in front of me trying to take pictures of themselves with the Harbour Bridge at the background. Did you know that some people have the nerves to walk along the top of the bridge? I mean, the height of it! I would probably throw up all over the place if I was there.

There was this one time where we ended up by the sea at around 7 that night. The Harbour Bridge was in view, the Opera House was sparkling and the whole city to the left was all lights and tall buildings. We sat on the benches and talked and ate KFC and had drinks. People were passing by doing their own business, and I saw small cafes further up the road. It was full of people and it was lonely at the same time. We were sitting right off the sea and the bridge. Then I realised, this is one of my to-do lists in life! I had this one long list of things that I want to do before I die. Nothing ridiculous, just things that are achievable but I am yet to do. Like bitch slapping someone and getting away with it. Go ice-skating in an open park at night. Learn to play the guitar. At #15 in the list I said 'have coffee by the bridge beside the sea/river at night'. And I did it! I can now tick that one out of the list!

Then we moved to Canberra. It was a nice, small, quiet place, the kind of place where you would certainly consider spending your retired days in when you're old and crumpled. I have this mental image of me, 50 years from now (or more, hopefully!), with a face that looks as if I just ate a whole lemon, and the juices all sucked out of me, walking along the streets where the trees are bare and the green fields empty. Canberra has by far the best variety of restaurants I've seen in Australia. Pancake Parlour was amazing! It has an old pub feel to it, and wooden furnitures and floors and vintage paintings made the place feel warm despite the weather outside that could literally give your nose a frost-bite. Oh, and let's not go to the pancakes. I will only say this; if I am to go on a hiking trip to the Everest, and I'm only allowed to bring one single meal, that would be it! The people in Canberra was so nice as well! The girls were friendly,and here I thought they stopped making nice boys in this world =P.

When I had to leave I wanted to bawl my eyes out so baaad, but my macho-ness got the better of me. Hana and Zaza was there at the bus stop, and as I sat in the bus while they passed by, all I could think of was that here was another goodbye; I do not own any better friends than my boarding school girls. I mean, imagine this. I was going on a skiing trip early that morning and I forgot my shoes. Zaza and Hana both drove back to send them to me at 2 in the morning! Who the hell does that? I was really touched that they went through all the trouble so the lousy-clumsy me could get my shoes.

When I got to Sydney airport Odd came to have lunch with me even when it was for a couple of hours. She came with a cab to have boring sandwiches with me for 2 hours. I love her for that!

So that basically wraps up my whole winter holiday. You know you've had the perfect holiday when

1. Something broke (Zaza's heater leg.Sorry!)

2. Someone falls brutally but escapes with no broken ribs (me down Perisher. Fuzzy.=P)

3. You learn new words (sengkiu!)

4. You find people shorter than you (sorry Hana. I love you really)

5. You find someone cute =)

6. You realise Perth is not alone in the boring-city category

7. You buy something you would never have bought (a magazine just so you get the free notebook)

8. You spent all your money

9. You gain an extra kilo

10. You come back happier than ever!

All I want is to have coffee by the bridge

I woke up today and had the worst feeling ever. I'm 19. Already? It's a scary era where all that my housemates ever talk about is getting hitched, and all the boys seems so, well, so. Full stop. I haven't found any word in the dictionary that could express that thing most accurately. Then I just pulled the blinds over and watched the sky from my bed. Autumn. It's all dark and murky during this season. I don't feel like waking up, because once i place my feet on the carpet, it signals the start of a day of papers and books and God forbid results for my previous tests.

If I die today, right this second, what will I regret most? I mean, besides all the crap I've been doing in my actions. It will be a life not lived. A life where all I did was follow the world, instead of the world following me. I grew up with school and books, and live my life along them. Stress? Exams are coming. Happiness? I got superb grades. Depression? I flunked my algebra.

Nothing in my life, it seems, revolve from anything else except education. My parents take pride in me being all smart, and I'm glad they feel that way. I love that feeling too, you know, being all above people and everything. But honestly, if there's this one wish that I could possibly have, it's just to chuck everything aside, move to London, start a career designing bags and shoes, and travel.

I know, I sound like those girls who got in the Oprah show, saying things like 'I hated my life, that's why I took math drugs and decided to jump off a building, bla bla bla.' For one thing, who the hell said drugs can cure? i mean, sure, you get stoned and you don't have to face the misery of being just a bullshit to the world, but come on. Once the whole 'high' thing is over, you'll become a miserable bullshit all over again. So you might as well get over it in sanity.

And plus, I'm not saying I hated myself. I don't. I'm grateful for what I already have, but I just knew, I just know, that there are so much more to life than just books. I live in a staple world where you're either academically smart or just plain dumb for anything else. Nobody cares much about boots. By boots, I mean alternatives. A life of travelling. A life of enjoying the moments of having coffee by the bridge. A life of freedom to do what we want as long as it's right.

Sometimes, I just hated everyone around me. They only remind me of the boring life. The life where all my girlfriends ever do is gossip and bitch behind someone else's back. I'm tired of gossiping. Waste of time, and a waste of space. What do I care? It's not that my life is perfect that I can actually judge other people now. I hate people judging me, so why am I jugdging people?

Then there are the boys. They're nice boys, if I may say. They're great friends. Not the kind of all-i-think-about-is-getting-laid kind of boys. They actually have personalities. But sometimes I get so sick of them as well. We come from this different world where there's a set of mentality. It has nothing to do with my religion. In fact, bless my religion, it's the only thing that I could rely on. I seek solace in this one truth and one belief. I feel like the nobody understands me and complete me more than God. I'm glad for that.

Okay, anyways. I hate the 'mentality'. After writing this, I realise that it's not the problem with the people. It's the problem with the mentality. So that's my worst enemy.

Why God Created Rain

I finished class at 3 p.m today, and by the time I walked out of the lecture hall, it was raining really heavily. It wasn't like those tropical, heavy raindrops I used to get, what with the scary thunders and lightnings and all. It was a silent shower, the kind that creates a mist around, and it's only until you're standing in the middle of it that you know it's a heavy shower.

Well, I wanted to get home quickly, since I haven't done my yoga for days, so I decided to walk it through. The water was like ice, and it made me wince everytime the wind blows it to my face. But somehow, it felt kind of good, actually. The smell of it, is just really fresh, and your clothes are all wet, and you're cold all over. It felt like the nature's way of cleansing. It felt good, although I was shaking like anything when I got home. Plus I didn't even have a jacket to cover my face, only a plastic file with my lecture papers in them.

It was a good twenty minute walk home, and as splash-splash-splash goes my Sembonia shoes in the puddles and water drains, I felt like I was walking down the London streets. God I loved that city. I love the busy streets and the classic buildings and the misty rain that always seem to surround it. Coldness is misery when you're walking outside, but sometimess it feels good, like reality, freshness of something that comes from nature straight to you. When I'm standing in the rain, I feel kind of at peace with myself, like I can sit there for hours and think about everything. And I mean everything, like my dreams and ambitions, my search of something that's so much more than I could see, and my family.

The overcast and grey skies always remind me of my family. I love it, I love everything about my family. I think about my father's hard work and his devotion to my mother, and it makes me want to be that lucky in love too. And my mother's pure, pure heart. She's the kind of woman that I want to be. She found what was hers, and she embraced it. And my siblings are more than I could ask for.

When I got home, I was a huge sloppy mess. But it's good to be home. It's good to see the rain pouring outside and knowing that I'm safe inside. Then I changed to my pyjamas, made a cup of tea, and here I am, sitting by the window and watching the rain. I see rooftops of houses, and the infinite murky sky. Cars drive by down the street, and it's all misty around. I watch the water on the roadside moving fast. Can life turn extraordinary? Can we get more than what we see? Can in one minute, something happens to you, and it makes you love living all over again?

Rain. It's a simple, natural thing, but everyone have their own secret story behind the pouring water and blowing wind. And more suprisingly, one person might have the same story as you do. The same story about the dark sky, the icy water and that smell, that smell that's just indescribable. The smell of water and grass and cold and wind, all mixed up in one. I don't know anyone who hates that smell.

Sigh.

Global Warming: Save Trees and VIRGINITY!

Okay, I think the title speaks for itself. I'm not just saying this because I'm a virgin, or anything. It's just that nowadays, come on, people, let's just face it, sex is everywhere! I used to be a huge fan of Grey's Anatomy, but unfortunately, not so much anymore. It used to be a real great drama about life, now I think it's just a cliched, boring drama as an excuse to display random sex between everyone and everyone else.

I know, I may sound like someone who practically lives in another planet and am having a huge culture shock issue. And I know it's sooo normal, people do it all the time, and they do it everywhere, and talking about it is like the most natural thing in the world. But seriously, there's got to be a reason why we're born with VIRGINITY. I'm pretty sure there's a better reason why people are born with virginity that lasts only once. If there's no purpose for it, we would all be born without one, right?

Think about it. If you want to get married, wouldn't it be so much better to be with someone that truly loves you that they'll share that one thing, just with you and no one else in the whole world? And if she or he is not a virgin, I mean, what's so special of you for being their partner? You'll be no different to the rest of other 10 guys or girls who've already scored with her. And the other 10 guys or girls would know exactly what you've got. In details.

Some people might say, if you want to buy a car, you should at least take it for a test drive, as a metaphor to marriage. So you test drive it, and you find that it's good, and so does the other 6 cars that you tested. But the car that you would really want, that would be the car that you've seen in the commercial for a long time and have wanted it for so long, that you wouldn't mind buying it straight away without test driving it. Then once you've got it, well, you'll really appreciate it because you've been wanting it for so long. Does my metaphor get you?

Even Jessica Simpson said that it was worth every second waiting. And personally, I really do think that girls who give themselves freely are really kinda silly. I mean, obviously the guy would just want you for your booty. And there's this campaign i saw on TV. It says, if you get pregnant, do you actually think he'll love you more? If he walks away, then you'll pretty much be left behind, being a sad single mum, without any spouse's support. If he really loves you, then, well, he would really want to be responsible for you, right?

Well, enough said. I've got a one-week camping trip tomorrow. Got to get my ass in gear.